Before Your Child’s First Special Education Meeting: What Every Parent Should Know
What Information Do Parents Wish They Had Received Before Their Child’s First Special Education Meeting?
Written by Chotimanee Guandique
ParentsOfBraveHearts | Parent Education & Family Resources
Why I Chose to Write About This Topic
As a parent, I have attended and requested school meetings to discuss my child’s educational needs. I remember that, during my first educational meeting, I had many questions about its purpose, what would happen, and how I could prepare.
English is my second language, so understanding educational terminology and the school process was something I had to learn along the way. Through my own research and experiences, I gradually gained a better understanding of how school meetings work and why parent participation matters.
This experience inspired me to create educational resources that help other parents feel more informed and prepared.
At ParentsOfBraveHearts, I believe that every parent deserves access to clear, understandable information about their child’s education. You do not need to know everything before attending a meeting. Sometimes, knowing what questions to ask is the first important step.
In my next blog article, I will explain what a CSE (Committee on Special Education) meeting is and its role in New York’s special education system.
For today, let’s begin with the basics: understanding the purpose of a school meeting, knowing what to expect, and learning how to prepare.
Your Child Has a Meeting at School. Now What?
Receiving a call or letter from your child’s school about a meeting may bring several questions.
Why is the meeting taking place? Who will attend? What should I bring? Will I have an opportunity to share my concerns? What happens after the meeting?
For families who are new to special education, these questions are completely understandable. Parents may be learning about developmental evaluations, educational assessments, Individualized Education Programs (IEPs), related services, and unfamiliar terminology at the same time.
This article combines personal experience with existing research and official educational resources to help parents better understand the process.
Here are seven things every parent should know before attending their child’s first special education meeting.
1. Understand Why the Meeting Is Taking Place
The first step is to understand the purpose of the meeting.
A school meeting may involve reviewing evaluation results, discussing special education eligibility, developing an IEP, reviewing educational needs, or planning services. Not every school meeting serves the same purpose.
An IEP is a written educational plan developed for an eligible student with a disability who needs special education and related services.
Before attending, consider asking the school:
What is the purpose of this meeting?
Is this an evaluation review, an initial eligibility meeting, or an IEP development meeting?
What topics will we discuss?
What information should I review beforehand?
Who is expected to attend?
Understanding the purpose helps you prepare questions and participate more confidently.
Parent tip: If you are unsure why a meeting has been scheduled, contact the school and ask for a clear explanation before attending.
2. Understand the Difference Between a Developmental Evaluation and a School Evaluation
Parents may encounter different types of evaluations, including developmental, medical, psychological, speech-language, occupational therapy, and educational assessments.
These evaluations may serve different purposes.
A developmental or medical evaluation may help identify a child’s developmental profile or diagnose a condition. A school evaluation examines a child’s educational needs to help determine eligibility for special education and identify appropriate educational supports.
A medical diagnosis does not automatically establish eligibility for special education.
Schools must follow applicable evaluation and eligibility requirements.
You can ask:
What evaluations have been completed?
What do the results tell us about my child’s strengths and needs?
Are additional evaluations needed?
How will the results help the team plan educational support?
Can I receive copies of the reports and have time to review them?
You do not have to understand every technical term immediately. Ask the professionals to explain their findings in language you understand.
3. Know Who May Attend the Meeting
An IEP meeting may include parents, teachers, a school district representative, professionals who can interpret evaluation results, and other required or appropriate participants.
The team members’ roles depend on the meeting’s purpose and applicable requirements.
Parents can ask:
Who will attend the meeting?
What is each person’s role?
Who will explain the evaluation results?
Who will answer questions about educational goals and services?
May I invite someone with relevant knowledge or expertise to support me?
Parents are important members of the IEP team because they know their children in ways that school reports alone cannot fully describe.
Your observations about your child’s communication, interests, routines, strengths, challenges, and experiences at home can contribute to a better understanding of your child’s needs.
4. Prepare Questions Before You Attend
Preparing questions in advance can help you stay focused during the meeting.
About your child’s strengths and needs
What are my child’s current strengths?
What skills need additional support?
How do the evaluation results relate to what we observe at home?
About educational goals
What goals are being considered?
How will progress be measured?
How will I receive updates about my child’s progress?
About services and support
What services or accommodations are being considered?
Why are these supports recommended?
How will the team determine whether the supports are helping?
About communication and next steps
Who should I contact if I have questions?
When will I receive the written documents?
What happens after the meeting?
You do not need to ask every question at once. Choose the questions that are most important to your child’s needs.
5. Review Documents and Share Your Observations
Before the meeting, ask whether the school can provide evaluation reports, draft documents when available, or other relevant information for you to review.
You can also prepare notes about your child’s strengths, interests, communication, daily routines, learning experiences, and areas where support may be needed.
For example, you might explain what helps your child communicate, how transitions affect them, what motivates them to participate, or which strategies work well at home.
These observations can help the team understand your child as an individual.
If you need additional time to understand a document, ask the school to explain the information and clarify what review options are available.
6. Ask for Clarification When You Need It
Special education meetings may include unfamiliar terminology, abbreviations, and professional recommendations.
It is appropriate to ask questions whenever something is unclear.
You might say:
“Could you explain that in simpler terms?”
“How would this affect my child during the school day?”
“Could you give me an example?”
“How will we know whether this strategy is working?”
“Could we review that recommendation together?”
If English is not your preferred language for educational discussions, ask the school about interpreter services and translated documents that may be available or required.
You can also request that important information be summarized before the meeting ends.
Asking questions is part of being an informed parent. You do not need to be an expert in special education to participate meaningfully in discussions about your child.
If you have concerns about a recommendation, explain them and ask the team to discuss your concerns and applicable options.
7. Understand What Happens After the Meeting
Before the meeting ends, make sure you understand the next steps.
Consider asking:
When will I receive the finalized documents?
Who will contact me about the next steps?
How will the school communicate my child’s progress?
Who should I contact if I have concerns?
What procedures apply if I disagree with a decision?
If your child is found eligible for an IEP, the team will develop an educational plan according to applicable requirements. If your child is not found eligible, ask the school to explain the decision, the information considered, and any applicable options or procedures.
Keep copies of meeting notices, evaluation reports, educational documents, and correspondence in an organized folder. Recording important dates and follow-up questions can also help you stay informed.
What Does Existing Research Tell Us About Parent Preparation?
Published research has examined parent preparation and experiences with IEP meetings.
Hammond and Ingalls (2017) studied a preparation program for parents attending their initial IEP meetings. Their work examined how preparation could improve parents’ knowledge and perceptions of the meeting process.
Sanderson (2023) analyzed responses from a national web-based survey of 803 parents of school-aged students with disabilities who had current IEPs. The study explored parents’ meeting experiences and advice concerning preparation, advocacy, support, and participation.
These studies provide useful background for understanding why parent preparation matters. However, they do not mean that every family has the same experience or needs the same resources.
For this article, existing published research is used as a reference. No original parent survey was conducted by the author.
An important question remains for parent education:
What information do parents wish they had received before their child’s first special education meeting?
By reviewing existing research and listening to families, educators and family resource providers can better understand where clear explanations, practical checklists, and accessible educational resources may help.
A Message to Parents of Brave Hearts
Your child’s first special education meeting is an opportunity to learn, ask questions, share observations, and better understand your child’s educational needs.
You can prepare by reviewing available information, writing down your questions, and asking professionals to explain anything that is unclear.
You know your child in ways that no report can fully capture. Your perspective is an important part of understanding your child’s strengths, needs, and experiences.
You do not need to know every answer before entering the meeting. You can learn step by step, ask for support, and seek reliable information along the way.
At ParentsOfBraveHearts, my goal is to make educational information easier for families to understand and help parents feel more confident participating in conversations about their children’s education.
Preparation is not about knowing every answer. It is about feeling informed enough to ask the questions that matter.
In my next article, I will explain what a CSE meeting is, its role in New York’s special education system, and what parents should know about the process.
You are not alone in learning this journey.
References and Further Reading
Published Research
Hammond, H., & Ingalls, L. (2017). Let’s get parents ready for their initial IEP meeting. Journal of the American Academy of Special Education Professionals, 12(3), 31–43. https://doi.org/10.64546/jaasep.345
Sanderson, K. A. (2023). “Be prepared to fight like hell”: Parent advice for IEP meetings. Exceptionality, 31(5), 344–361. https://doi.org/10.1080/09362835.2023.2184819
Official Educational Resources
New York City Public Schools. IEP Meeting.
New York State Education Department. Special Education in New York State for Preschool and School-Age Students with Disabilities: A Parent’s Guide.
U.S. Department of Education. Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA): Parent Participation.
Educational disclaimer: This article provides general educational information and is not legal, medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice. Special education procedures and rights depend on applicable laws and individual circumstances.
About the Author
Chotimanee Guandique is the founder of ParentsOfBraveHearts, a parent-focused educational resource initiative dedicated to sharing educational information, encouraging informed participation in special education, and connecting families with resources to support their children’s educational journeys.
Through educational articles and family resources, she aims to help parents feel more informed, confident, and prepared to ask questions about their children’s education.
ParentsOfBraveHearts | Empowering parents through education, understanding, and support.
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